Flutter By: From Ruins to Royalty. Recapturing Your Abandoned Palaces.

In the past week, I randomly kept coming across insane photos of grand old homes and palaces that had been forgotten over the years-- time hasn't been kind to them, but beauty still glimmers through the decay and neglect. There is something tragic, yet so magical and captivating about them. It's funny what God uses to speak to us. And this week, it has been these palatial places from the past.

I don't know why these images have taken me the way they have. I think because they remind me of myself. And what happens we abandon the thrones and the titles that have been given to us. When I look at these pictures, I see God's heart for me. I see his desire for me to live in a place of extravagant, unthinkable beauty, that's so amazing and overtop. And then I think about myself. And I see a girl from Cullman, Alabama, whose feels more normal than royal. I have a hard time getting my head around that fact that God desires for me to inhabit dreams that are palace level-- no double-wide dreams. Or even McMansion dreams. When I think about living in a house like that, I'm totally down for the servant role-- and I can feel confident that I'd be a pretty fab one, at that, like Anna from Downtown Abbey. Head Lady's Maid. You get to live in the house, rub elbows with the fam, be a part of the whole "life" in a kinda/sorta way. I would dominate braiding their hair, picking out their outfits, and cheering them on when a new suitor came knocking.

But when it's my castle and no one else's, do I feel big enough to walk in those shoes? Ummm.... not so much. My Steve Maddens feel a little lowly for such a lofty calling. In my head, of course I know that I'm worthy of that. But in my heart, it's way more comfortable, and believable, to be on the sidelines. The hair braider and suitor cheerer. Not Queen B. It reminds me of one of my all-time favorite movie lines from The Holiday when Kate Winslet says, "You should at least be the Leading Lady in your own damn life." And that's how I feel about living in these palaces. I want to start living like I'm the Leading Lady of my own damn life. All the time. Not just some of the time. In my head. And my heart. No more, "Leading Lady if I lost 5 pounds." No more, "Leading Lady if was dating ___ or married to ___." No more, "Leading Lady if I landed a big client." No more, "Leading Lady if ___ accepted me."

I don't know what titles you've been looking for to make you feel worthy of your palace, but today, instead of being comfortable as the Lady's Maid, or only feeling worthy to rule your castle if you got a few more badges to finally "rank up" to the next level, own your birthright, the title you were given from before you were born and the one you are being called today. And that's the Queen of Your Castle (with the full deed, no mortgage payments or interest). Put on your crown, take back your title, and walk the halls of your palace like you own the place. Because you do.

Here's my prayer today, "Jesus, thank you that you call me who I am, even when I don't see it. And thank you that my title and my crown is already secured in you. I repent for choosing the servants quarters when all along you've had a full palace waiting for me to rule it. Today, I pick up my crown and put on my sash and I wear them with pride. Help me rebuild and restore the royalty that you want me to live in every day. Thank you that that is your true heart for me."

photos by Patrycja Makowska unless otherwise noted

And how FREAKING COOL IS THIS??? an Australian couple bought Chateau de Gudanes, a crumbling estate in France, and are in the process of restoring all of its 94 rooms back to their former glory. Ah! I know, so awesome. You can follow their blog and Instagram feed here.