What I Learned in Barcelona... Living Fearlessly: It Hurts Less Than You Think

Sometimes it's a Selfie Season. Be your best Selfie!

I've been holding off on writing my first Barcelona blog post because it feels like a baby. They always say there's never a good time to have a baby and this is my baby. I've been waiting to have enough time on my hands to actually do the trip a little justice with the skill of my pen keys. Instead of giving you a play-by-play of my days (don't you worry, there is a meticulously detailed and fabulous food guide coming... because I pretty much spent all my time eating and then killed time knocking around town until I got to eat again) I felt like it would be easier for me to paint with broad brush strokes. So here we go. Brush stroke numero uno.

For any of you who know me, you know I hate being alone. My mom hates it when I use the word "hate" because she says it's "a very strong word." Good, then in this case, I'll use the word hate. I hate being alone. Perhaps that's why I'm a twin. Before I even entered the world, I had a wombmate. Fast forward to Barcelona. In my mind, I was jetting off to the home of espadrilles, tapas, and tall, dark and handsome men who make riding scooters look rugged. I didn't think through the fact that my friend who coordinated this trip-- her name will not be disclosed due to the fact that she smuggled me into her hotel room--would be working the whole time. Hence, a work trip. In the magazine world, "work" trip is a word used verrrry loosely. In my experience, work trips meant shopping, eating, drinking, and playing on someone else's tab. Hello, corporate card. But at her job, you actually work on work trips. While she was busy shaking her money maker, I was on my own.

When you have no one else to distract you, you learn so much about yourself. When you don't have an iPhone to distract you, you really learn a lot about yourself. My electronic security blanket was gone. There were no longer texts to make look busy and an Instagram feed to keep me from feeling alone. So, I did the unthinkable. I lived like it was the 90s! Meal times quickly became my favorite part of the day-- befriending the waiters, the table next to me, and best of all, myself! Challenge yourself to go out to eat alone just once, no cell phone. You'll be surprised how much you learn about yourself. And how naked you feel without a phone (the panic will wear off, trust me). I quickly realized that my world that typically feels so big and all-consuming isn't really that big. It is actually tiny. I also realized that I have nothing to fear. I came back to Spain with my bags full of retail treasures (new suede booties proudly perched in my closet) and my heart empty of fear. I left caring what people think about me in Spain. I don't care what people think anymore.

I'm tired of not getting to live the greatest adventure God has for me because I'm afraid of what people will think. I used to care more about their opinion than the great adventure. Now, getting to the end of my life with adventures that were never lived, that terrifies me. Not living full-throttle because you're afraid of what people may think really just means you're signing up for an average existence paralyzed by not rocking the boat. What a loss. I'm jumping ship.

Come find me. I might be sitting at a table alone, loving every second of it.

TBT: Why I'm In Love with The Limited. It's Scandalous.

I vividly remember going to North Carolina right after Christmas. I had packed my brand new Nike duffel, which I was so proud of because I knew I had just secured some major cool points, with all of my new sweaters from Limited Too-- most had some type of flammable fur trim or a zipper accent-- along with piece de resistance, acid green plaid pants. I. Was. Killing. It. Then, then unthinkable happened. My carefully packed Nike duffel, filled with precious garment cargo fresh off Santa's sleigh, flew off the back of dad's truck and I watched as each of my day-old presents were mauled on the Interstate by an army of 18-wheelers. Since that day, I never shopped at The Limited. Until now.

One more story. Bear with me. Last Saturday was overcast, and for the first time in a long time, cold. What's a girl to do on a cold, overcast Saturday when all of your friends are watching football games you don't care about? Netflix and Thai takeout! Everyone I know can't stop talking about how obsessed they are with Scandal. I'd never seen the show so I decided to watch it. WARNING: Do not watch unless you want a new TV obsession. I burned through Season 1 that day and am now midway through Season 2. Carrie Washington is my new girl crush and I wish I could be Olivia Pope. I may not be able to be Olivia, but now, thanks to The Limited, I can dress like her. Never on a TV show has someone looked so elegant. She kills it. Impeccable outerwear, tailored trousers, bow-front silk blouses, capes, and even elbow-length leather gloves steal the show every episode. I'm actually jealous that I don't wear business clothes to work now. The Limited teamed up with Kerry Washington and Scandal's costume designer to make a line of accessible, feminine, tailored clothing inspired by the show. It hits racks online and in stores Sept 23. Here are some of my favorite looks from the show along with the full look book of THE NEW COLLECTION!

The Full Limited Scandal Look Book

The One Lip Color You Need For Fall

The title says it all. This is the one lip color you need for fall. When I was in Barcelona, my lovely roommate introduced me to the most sumptuous shade of red: NARS Afghan Red. Don't go all Freedom Fries on me and not wear it because of the name. You might be thinking about Bin Laden but all I can think about is how much I Bin Lovin it. (Ah, wow, my wit is on point for a Monday!) I would describe it as a moody mulberry-- it's a red with lots of deep purple. Almost a Merlot or wine-red without going 90's brown-ish. Bonus: lipsticks with blue undertones make your teeth look whiter.

NARS Afghan Red, $26; narscosmetics.com

The Best Summer-to-Fall Seasonal Side Ever

Yotam Ottolenghi. The man. The myth. The vegetable legend. If you don't know him, look him up. His cookbooks will change your life. He does vegetables with soul. In meal form, vegetables are like Britney's backups, Maverick's Goose, Beyonce's Jay Z-- they play the supporting actress, backup singer, wing man roles. But not in Yotam's world. He puts veggies in diva mode. 

I love summer. I love fall. But I don't love fummer. Fummer is a bummer. Football season has kicked off, you can smell the pumpkin spice lattes, you break out in song and chunky sweaters... then you step outside in your boots, freshly dusted off after hibernation to quickly realize it's 90 degrees and 80% humidity. Fummer bummer. And food's the same way. I'm not ready for a full-blown bowl of chili. But I'm kinda over sliced heirloom tomatoes in everything. Enter this side dish: Roasted Sweet Potatoes with Balsamic Reduction, Chili Oil, Figs, and Goat Cheese. Yep, jot this down and go straight to the farmer's market. It's all in season. I served it with grilled chicken. Any protein would be delicious with this. Kisses, Yotam. I loved this one. From his cookbook, JERUSALEM.

No filter. Just delicious.

ingredients

• 4 small sweet potatoes (2 1/4 lb / 1 kg in total)
• 5 tbsp olive oil
• scant 3 tbsp / 40 ml balsamic vinegar (you can use a commercial rather than a premium aged grade)
• 1 1/2 tbsp / 20 g superfine sugar
• 12 green onions, halved lengthwise and cut into 1 1/2-in / 4cm segments
• 1 red chile, thinly sliced
• 6 ripe figs (8 1/2 oz / 240 g in total), quartered
• 5 oz / 150 g soft goat's milk cheese (optional)
• Maldon sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

preparation

Preheat the oven to 475°F / 240°C.

Wash the sweet potatoes, halve them lengthwise, and then cut each half again similarly into 3 long wedges. Mix with 3 tablespoons of the olive oil, 2 teaspoons salt, and some black pepper. Spread the wedges out, skin side down, on a baking sheet and cook for about 25 minutes, until soft but not mushy. Remove from the oven and leave to cool down.

To make the balsamic reduction, place the balsamic vinegar and sugar in a small saucepan. Bring to a boil, then decrease the heat and simmer for 2 to 4 minutes, until it thickens. Be sure to remove the pan from the heat when the vinegar is still runnier than honey; it will continue to thicken as it cools. Stir in a drop of water before serving if it does become too thick to drizzle.

Arrange the sweet potatoes on a serving platter. Heat the remaining oil in a medium saucepan over medium heat and add the green onions and chile. Fry for 4 to 5 minutes, stirring often to make sure not to burn the chile. Spoon the oil, onions, and chile over the sweet potatoes. Dot the figs among the wedges and then drizzle over the balsamic reduction. Serve at room temperature. Crumble the cheese over the top, if using.

Bon Voyage! Barcelona Here I Come!

This is simply a Do Not Press the Panic Button or hit me with a flurry and slurry of "have you stopped blogging?" questions. I'm on VACAY! TO ESPANA! I'll be back the second week in September and you can most certainly expect to be hearing from me then. Until next time...

BON VOYAGE! 

Aw Naw They Didn'... Maybelline shows YSL What's Up

In my younger, less wiser years, I was a department store makeup buyer. If it wasn't from a department store, then I didn't want anything to do with it. These lips were made for Chanel. These eyes? Dior. This face? Armani. But in my older, wiser, and far more budget-friendly days, I have become a resourceful animal-- like a wild chetah, carefully hunting her next purchase, hungry and on the prowl for a good product that works just as well as my overpriced, fair-weathered friends at the department store counters.

I was on a late-night hunt, scouring the sahara of Walgreens and all of sudden I realized I was staring at Maybelline's Dream LumiTouch, a $7.99 knock off of one of my favorite department store splurges, YSL's Touche Eclat (notice that Maybelline used "Touch" in the name? They are throwing down) that runs $41 a pop. Add. to. cart.

This baby did not disappoint. Maybelline markets DLT as a concealer but it's really a highlighter/brightener. And just like YSL, it's in a pen for precise application. I use it in a number of ways. For everyday makeup, I don't wear lots of foundation. Usually just a tinted moisturizer. So the LumiTouch is great because I'll add a quick swipe under my eyes, on the tops of my brow bones and cheek bones for a sheer highlighter. Buy it one to two shades lighter than your skin tone for extra light-reflecting. I'll always love my YSL Touche Eclat, but I'm glad to have Dream LumiTouch in my arsenal for only $8 bucks.  Here's a good before/after that CORALLISTA did.

Maybelline Dream LumiTouch, $8; maybelline.com

YSL Touche Eclat, $41; sephora.com

The Spiritual Version of Going from Payless to Louboutins... Upgradin' Baby!

It's been one of those seasons... actually, it's been 2014. The Year of Letting Go. Which, in some ways is true. But instead, I like to think of it as The Year of Upgrades. I think if it was only called The Year of Letting Go, I would have tapped out, gone 4 pints deep in Ben Jerry's binging on Real Housewives of New Jersey and taking "showers" that consisted of dry shampoo and deodorant.

I'm a gift giver. That's my love language through and through. I love stuff. I love to get presents. I love to give presents. Presents speak to my heart. Presents and I, we get each other. And Jesus knows that. Coming from someone who is a gift giver, having the Year of Letting Go is my version of Red Alert. Panic Button. Mach 5 Freak Out. It's asking a gift giver to give away their favorite presents. Aw, hell naw. That was my initial reaction.

Then, my second reaction was negotiating with God. Actually, it was probably closer to arguing but negotiating sounds holier. So that's what we're going with. I was trying to explain to God that really, I was quite happy with what I had but he was asking me to upgrade (who doesn't want an upgrade-- at the Verizon store, with your used Chevy, can I get an amen?). But upgrading can be sad. The best way I can describe it is with shoes. The "shoes" I was walking in were really cute and getting me where I needed to go. And I loved them. During one of our negotiating conversations, God showed me a picture of myself wearing Payless shoes and he asked me if I would give them to him so he could give me Louboutins. And that was all I needed.

I gave away my pair of Payless. But now I'm in the hard part. I'm still waiting for my Loubies. I'm looking at my life without a cloud in the sky, believing that rain is coming. And I know my Loubies coming. But I haven't seen them yet. I'm here to encourage you and say, DON'T GIVE UP. Don't let your sunny sky tell you that it's never going to change.

If you live a life comfortable in Payless, you will have a Payless future. But if you live your life with Louboutin-level dreams, then you will have a Louboutin future. Don't be afraid if you can't see on the other side of what God is asking you to let go of. He's not asking to let go. He's trying to give you an upgrade. So stop wearing Payless. They never looked on you anyway.

Just as a little visual reference. Here are some Payless and Louboutins to help illustrate my point a little better. And I actually tried to find the best Payless had to offer for an honest comparison. Sister sent me this visual the other day that fit with this too.


Would you rather....

This... Or this...

           This...        Or this...

           This...        Or this...   

Heaven in a Glass: The Best Iced Coffee You'll Ever Drink. Ever.

I have found the nectar of the gods... Duncan Donuts Original Blend Cold Brewed Iced Coffee with Cream, Agave, and Cinnamon. Any mouthful of a drink name needs to back it up with ridiculous flavor. And this does.

It was a life-halting moment. And like any good life-halting moment, it started where most life-halting moments do: Wells Fargo online banking. It was one of those seasons when I couldn't figure out where all of my money was going. I swore up and down to my dad that I wasn't shopping-- not even a Target raid-- but I was constantly low on funds. Constantly. So, I hired a budget coach and realized that approximately $400 of my unaccounted dollars were being ground, brewed, and drained at America's silent dollar killer, Starbucks, every month. EVERY MONTH. Four hundo. Dalla bills. At Satanbucks. It's cruel. Absolutely cruel.

Needless to say, I quickly realized my Venti lifestyle need an immediate and drastic overhaul. Many... actually, a few moons ago, Birmingham used to have this great little market in Homewood called Tria Market. And Tria Market had a hidden liquid gem, their Iced Toddy coffee. The barista explained to me that they cold brewed their iced coffee for 12 hours. I had never tasted something so smooth, so rich, and so delicious in my life. Most iced coffees can be very bitter and acidic, however, this version is anything but.

I'm not a warm drink drinker. I'll do the occasional hot chocolate in the winter, but that's about it. There's something about a warm drink in the south that just doesn't jive with me. And it's way too cozy. Having a warm cup of coffee feels like a slap in the face to the fact that I have to wake up. All that warmth makes me want to crawl into bed. I prefer its cool caffeinated counterpart. It's Carpe Diem in a cup.

BRADLEY'S BEST COLD BREWED ICED COFFEE

STEP ONE

1. Start with a bag of your favorite coffee. Even if you're typically a dark or French roast drinker, go for a light or medium blend. Most breakfast blends are a good option. The darker roasts are typically too strong and can.... hmm... go out of you just as fast as they came in you (catch my drift?). Yeah, betcha won't be trying French Roast with this any time soon. 

My favorite is easily Dunkin Donuts Original Blend. I used to turn my nose up at it in the coffee aisle (they have a jelly donut flavor, for crying out loud) but don't hate till you partake. 

 STEP TWO

2. Pour 1 standard-size bag of ground coffee into a gallon jar or large stock pot (I find that stock pots are easier). Pour 1 gallon of water over the grounds. Stir until combined.

 STEP THREE

3. Let the iced coffee mixture sit overnight-- at least 12 hours. 

 STEP FOUR

4. Line a large colander with two paper towels-- it's essentially a jumbo coffee filter. I like to separate a sheet of two-ply paper towel so it filters faster. This photo is just an example. I like to use a bigger colander. Place the colander over another stock pot. Slowly pour the coffee mixture over the the colander.

STEP FIVE

5. Once your coffee has filtered through your colander contraption, pour into a pitcher and refrigerate. It's good for two weeks! 

FlutterBy Tips: I like to add a squeeze of agave and a little half and half over the iced coffee. Then I pour it back and forth between two cups to combine. Top it off with a little cinnamon! 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon a day can help lower your bad cholesterol (LDL). 

PHOTOS FROM SALLY PASLEY VARGAS AND NOSHONIT

Feel Good Friday

It's Friday. And nothing captures the joyful emotions of freedom coursing through my body quite like this mashup from the 1988 Crystal Light Aerobics Championships. Give me some spirit fingers and spandex! It's Friday, Friday, Friday!

Bon Weekend!

Wicker: The Comeback Kid

In my childhood, I wept bitter tears over the headboard that my mom made me have in bedroom. It was her's as a child (which was in the phase when hand-me-downs of any kind, vintage or not, were so uncool). It probably didn't help her cause that I was also forced during that same time period to join the band using her vintage clarinet (probably circa the same era as her headboard) because "every kid needs to know how to play a musical instrument." Needless to say, the cork on the clarinet had decomposed due to years of rotting away in the crushed red velvet case and I sat there with my vintage instrument when all the other kids got to play. Essentially, I was the nerd in the band. Which is pretty hard to do. It's another level of outcast.

I digress. Back to the headboards. Ok, so my mom had this-- at the time, I believed-- truly heinous headboard that she made my room the regretfully chosen landing spot for. Note: it was beautifully accented by my mauve walls. Some moms are cut from the retail therapy cloth: where buying something fixes everything, whether for themselves or their kids. That's not my mom. She's of the cheap resourceful breed. Which typically means, one way or another, she will hoard find a reason to never get rid of something because one day it will come back in style. There was great gnashing of teeth in the Nesbitt home when I threw away her J.Crew pleated front khakis and black leather, rubber-soled Mary Jane's. She still claims they're classics that will one day be in. Nine times out of ten, she's wrong. But occasionally, she nails it. In this case, she nailed it. And I would give anything to have that once-despised headboard in my house. Unfortunately, I think it met its demise at a forced hoarding intervention yard sale. So I'm going on the record to say, Sorry, mom. You were right. See how amazing wicker is looking these days (it's not your grandmother's patio furniture).

Most all of the rooms I've run across that use wicker have a heavy boho vibe. Which normally I don't mind. It's not my personal aesthetic but just like an occasional trip to Anthropologie, I can normally find something I like. But in the case of wicker, I'm talking heavy boho vibe. Like 50 shades of Urban Outfitters with stale patchouli lingering in the air. I couldn't find an image that worked, but I'd love to see someone use wicker in a non-gypsy princess way. Here are my favorite wicker finds! Shopping secret: the best place to look for wicker is Craigslist, Etsy, and Ebay. There are still plenty of people who aren't big fans of peacock wicker furniture and are selling it cheeeeeap. 

The Family Love Tree is the ulti-source for all things wicker. I like to spread the love with sourcing around and try not to just show a ton from one place, but sometimes, one place just does it better than the rest. And when it comes to reproduction wicker furny, The Family Love Tree is better than rest.

PEACOCK CHAIR, $795

LARGE RATTAN PENDANT, $169

SMALL DAISY WEAVE RUG, $200

WICKER MIRROR, $69.96 

(on sale and only one left)

No longer available. 

WICKER ELEPHANT STOOL, $85 (!!)

on Ebay, so hurry!